Words of Old...

From the Red Hymnal...

Song #91: My Song is Love Unknown

My song is love unknown, My Savior's love to me,
Love to the loveless shown That they might lovely be.
Oh, who am I That for my sake
My Lord should take frail flesh and die?

He came from his blest throne Salvation to bestow;
But men made strange, and none The longed for Christ would know.
But, oh, my friend, My friend indeed,
Who at my need His life did spend!

Sometimes they strew his way And his sweet praises sing;
Resounding all the day Hosannas to their King.
Then "Crucify" is all their breath,
And for his death They thirst and cry.

Why, what hath my Lord done? What makes this rage and spite?
He made the lame to run, He gave the blind their sight,
Sweet injuries! Yet they at these
Themselves displease and 'gainst him rise.

A new chapter...

A page has turned. Another chapter begins. 2011. What will it bring? Who can imagine?

I think of 2010 and all the twists and turns that I never could have imagined on Jan 1 of last year. But before it began, God knew...

He knew of the new friendships to be discovered (ie Ashley & Allison), new family members (making Dave & Lauren official SLOANS!), new talents to be developed (drawing class and my ballerina), new homes to purchase, new processes to learn (BUYING the home), new fears within the corners of my soul to face, new adventures to take (The Bahamas and AFRICA!), new languages to learn, new truths to learn about myself, new projects to support, new goodbyes to be said, new colleagues at work (Sara, Beth, Rashmi, Erin, Megan - new young providers!), and even a new roommate in the last week of 2010 (my sister Karen!). It has not always been easy; in fact, it has rarely been easy. It's been a year of tough questions. God has given me so much this year - but rarely when and how I've asked for it. 2010 has been a year of great molding and refining, but it has been an interesting year to walk beside my Lord. It has been a wild ride! I am slowly but surely learning to let go and let Him take the wheel. SO SO hard for me, but I'm trying...

And so I look forward to the next chapter He has planned. I wait in eager anticipation to see it unfold. Will it bring love or heartache or friendship or betrayal or challenges or setbacks? I pray that be it good or bad, I might stay by His side through it all. I pray that Jan 1 2012 finds me closer to His heart, closer to His image...

I heard the song "No Matter What" by Kerrie Roberts on the radio today. It resonated within my heart today. May I continue to love Him ... no matter what the year might bring!
No Matter What...


No Matter What – Kerrie Roberts Lyrics and Chords

I’m running back to Your promises one more time
Lord that’s all I can hold on to
I gotta say this has taken me by surprise, but nothing surprises You
Before a heartache can ever touch my life
It has to go through Your hands
And even though I keep asking why, I keep asking why

No matter what, I’m gonna love You
No matter what I’m gonna need You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, if not, I’ll trust You no matter what, no matter what

When I’m stuck in this nothingness by myself
I’m just sitting in silence
There’s no way I can make it without Your help, I won’t even try it
I know You have Your reasons for everything so I will keep believing
Whatever I might be feeling, God You are my hope
And You will be my strength

Anything I don’t have You can give it to me, but it’s OK if You don’t
I’m not here for those things
The touch of Your love is enough on its own
No matter what I still love You and I’m gonna need You

No matter what I’m gonna love You, no matter what I’m gonna need You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, if not, I’ll trust You
I know You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, but if not, I’ll trust You

No matter what
No matter no matter what
No matter no matter what
No matter no matter what

Happy Birthday Laura!

Today is a big day. Today my baby sister turned 18. We are all officially adults now. Surreal.

What a wild ride it has been. May God shower her with His love today and always.

I've got a heart like Bethlehem...

So it only took 3 months to get back, but here I am... just in time to start thinking about Christmas...

We are now in the season of Advent...awaiting the arrival of our Lord and Savior. So I'm trying to anticipate His arrival...which is always so much harder than it should be...

I got the new Ross King CD this week - I love his music! He led worship at Breakaway when I was at A&M and writes incredibly atypical, profound songs ... most of the time. He just put out a Christmas CD, which has a song called "Bethlehem". I LOVE IT!! It is all whether there was room in the inn for Jesus and whether there's room in your heart for Jesus. It definitely resonates with this busy, busy time of year...where Jesus can get lost in all the Christmas preparations. How ironic.

Here are the lyrics. Enjoy!

Bethlehem
words and music by Ross King (c) 2010 Ross King

I've got a heart like Bethlehem on a silent night
Theres no room at the inn for you to come inside
I'm way too busy now, And its much too late
If you'd been here earlier
Maybe I could let you stay

You're only looking for a place
to be born into life
Where Your power can heal
Where Your love can revive
I don't know why you chose, To be born into me
But its hard to believe, and receive, and let you in
cause Ive got a heart like Bethlehem

I've got a heart like Bethlehem but I hide it well
I keep my dirty barns behind my nice hotels
But you see my great facade
And you're not impressed
You tell your story in the manger of my weaknesses

You're only looking for a place
to be born into life
Where Your power can heal
Where Your love can revive
I don't know why you chose, To be born into me
But its hard to believe, and receive, and let you in
cause Ive got a heart like Bethlehem

For years nobody knew us
but now when hear our name, they think of Jesus
That little town of Bethlehem
died that night

Sirens and more natural disasters...

As if the natural disasters of this weekend were not enough, they seem to have followed me back to America. I got home yesterday to gray clouds and a full day of steady rain. This morning, more rain and dark skies.

As I headed home, they mentioned on the radio a tornado had hit in Seagoville - well south of me. Hmm, I thought. And kept going.

I got home with great aspirations of cooking dinner and cleaning and organizing my home. And as I got the stuff out in the kitchen, I heard a funny noise from the front of the house. As I got to the front, I realized the ringing was from outside...and getting louder. I peeked outside - definitely sirens ... and some ominous clouds. So I turned on my computer to find a tornado had hit about 5 miles from my house.

By the sound of the sirens getting louder and louder, it seemed to be headed my way. Hmm. What to do? As I looked around, I realized that a house without hallways does not offer much in the way of hiding from tornados. I decided Jack should wait out the tornado in the bathroom, but he was in disagreement. As I tried to get a few supplies in the bathroom, Jack kept trying to escape. Of course, it was the day that EVERYTHING had a low battery - the computer and my cell phone. So as I am trying to plug in the extenstion cord for all of my electrical equipment, I decide that my closet would be a better option since there are no windows. I move Jack and my supplies into the closet to wait things out. Becca calls in the midst of my preparation to see if I'm okay. I say yes, but she's wasting valuable juice on the cell phone. And I cannot move Jack while on the phone. So I hurriedly get off. And then Jack and I hang out in the closet for about 10 minutes while the sirens continue to go off and my rickety old house rattles more than a little.
During this 20-25 minutes of tornado sirens, I realized several things.
1) I am in no way prepared for a tornado. I don't know what to do.
2) If the tornado was really coming for me, my 20 minutes of prep time would be a bit excessive.
3) When push comes to shove, I was worried about two things (and neither of them was me).
...The first was my baby...Jack. Even though he was not appreciative of my attempts at protecting him and fought me every step of the way. (Isn't that such a picture of us and God???)
...My most expensive possesion was huge and exposed to the elements. I wanted to throw myself over the house and protect it with my body...but that was not really an option. I just hoped that nothing would touch my pretty new house, that the plans to trim the trees next week would not come a week too late and that the dead branch hanging precariously over the house would remain precariously over the house for another week.

My first potential natural disaster as a homeowner was completely different than any before. I had a vested interest in this building around me. It was mine...and how it weathered the storm mattered to me. What a strange grown up thought...

Guatemalan wrap up...

Home again, home again! And I arrive in Dallas to pouring rain! I can't help but smile at the irony...

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TANIA!!! May the Lord rain down every blessing on you today and always. May He hold you always in His arms and love you fervently... How blessed I am to know you, Sweet girl!

Here's the last minute recap on the end of my trip to Guatemala. So beyond incredible! So relaxing, restoring to my soul! After I spent the day with Tania and her family, I returned to Antigua. I decided to go to the market to say hello to my friend, Nely. She befriended me in the market 8 years ago, and we have stayed in touch. Her youngest was a baby when I met her, and it is always fun to see how big he is getting! Kenneth was in the market with his mom yesterday - he is such a fun visual of the time we have known each other! Nely jumped up and gave me a big hug and we talked for an hour. She is an incredible woman of God with a sweet family. And I am so blessed that she was kind to me years ago.

One day in the market back in 2002, I was wandering the aisles of items. And a woman asked me what I wanted. I said I was just wandering...and she invited me to come back daily and practice my Spanish with her. I took her up on that offer, and we've been friends ever since. I have met her boys and her kind husband, Edwin. We have had many great conversations of Guatemala, of faith, of God, and many more topics. Yesterday was no exception! We had a wonderful time talking, and then I went around the corner to see Edwin at his shop and visit with him for a few minutes.

By then, it was getting dark, so I decided to go to Fredy's and say my goodbyes. When I arrived, his mother told me that Eylin, his sister, was upset I had not been to see her in her breadshop. She was eager to see me before I left. So I knew I needed to make a pit stop on the way home! Luckily, the bread shop was just around the corner...and Fredy's nephew, Angel, was designated my guide. We walked to the shop and I helped Eylin close up. She is another precious friend in Guatemala.

I invited her and her husband, Nehemias, to go to dinner with me. Begged them to go eat with me might be a better description, but at least it worked. For the first time in FOUR years of knowing her, she accepted my offer! The three of us went to dinner - Nachos at Mono Loco. YUMM!! Such a sweet night with sweet friends. I am so grateful for the friends that God has given me in that place... May He bless them abundantly. May I make my way south again soon to my 'other family' and 'my other home' ...

Good news and bad news...

So the main reason I went to Guatemala was to go and see my girls. They are getting older and changing so much. It was to be a double celebration. Tania turns 14 tomorrow...and Elida's big sister, Paula, is going to graduate from high school in November. This is a HUGE deal - especially for a poor, Mayan girl! I think she is the first in her family to graduate. I am so proud of her and so proud of her family for helping her get this far! So, I was all set to celebrate with my girls...

But God had other plans. It was a rainy weekend in Guatemala, but apparently it has been a very rainy summer in Guatemala. While this is their normal rainy season, this year has been exceptionally rainy. The most rain in 60 years! It started with Tropical Storm Agatha in May and hasn't really stopped since then. The rain caused a lot of problems during this past weekend. Huge mudslides up in the Highlands shut the major highway to the northwest. Flooding destroyed crucial bridges in the south and cut off the southwest from the rest of Guatemala. And so I got a call to tell me that Elida and Paula would not be meeting me. They had attempted to make the journey, but the highway was closed. I was disappointed, but knew it was the safest decision. Tania was able to make it from the north, but not without major delays. Her 8 hour trip took 16 hours due to mudslides on their route as well.

So things got off to a bit of a rocky start. I was excited to see Tania, but sad to miss seeing Elida & Paula. And Tania was disappointed to not see Elida as well. They have become good friends.

Wow! Tania has changed so much! She was 12 the last time I saw her; she'll be 14 tomorrow. She's growing up; she was shy for the first time ever. It took a bit to get her talking. So finally, I asked her to come sit with me alone and she relaxed and we started chatting like old times. She told me all about her family, and her move to live with her mother, how much she misses her grandmother who basically raised her, all the new things she is experiencing in Flores. She is so precious! After catching up, we went to play. This time we got to go to Futura Tikal - it's a mall with a bowling alley and games and bumper cars and stuff. It was fun.

It was a day of MANY firsts.
1) First time bowling for Tania, her mom, and Lupe, the worker from Tania's Compassion site. Lupe was a natural!
2) First time to try chinese food (Guatemala's version anyway). Tania's mom and Lupe LOVED it. Tania HATED it.
3) First time for Tania's mom to ride an escalator. This may have been the funniest part of the trip. She failed on the first attempt and insisted on taking the stairs. The second time, she had about 20 false starts and caused quite the back up for the escalator. But finally we got her to take the leap! She was nervous, but grinning the whole way up to the 3rd floor.

Such a great day with one of the most precious people on the planet. May God continue to grow her into a woman of righteousness. I pray that He would protect her heart and mind and spirit. I pray that He would draw her to Himself. I pray that she would always know the love of her Heavenly Father and fully grasp how valuable and precious she is!

I pray for Elida and Paula. Thought disappointed, I know that we will see each other again. I trust my Father to take care of them. I pray that He would keep them safe and well. I pray that their house would stand strong, that her family would be well, that they might all know the astounding love of Our Father. I hope that I may see them soon...what a great reason to go back soon!

Old friends are great too...

So after I spent the morning with the new missionaries, I headed to the Parque Central to meet up with my friend, Isabel. We met in Spanish school back in 2006. She has become a precious friend! I got to visit her when she was living with her aunt in Spain back in 2007. And last year, I got to go to her wedding in Guatemala. She and Ricardo are so sweet! Well, now they have a sweet new baby! Well, not so new. He's already 7 months old! And this was the first time for Tia Emily to meet her newest little cutie!

He was not too eager to let me hold him, but was all smiles if he stayed with mom! It was fun to see Isabel and her sweet family ... and to catch up on all the latest! God has given me such precious friendships in Guatemala. Wow!

Answered prayer! And new friends...

Wow! What a day! What a sweet way to answer prayer - and in abundance! Not just one friend but a group of them! Thank you, thank you, thank you Sweet Jesus!

So...I went to bed early last night hoping to make the most of today, but still I slept late. I slept ELEVEN hours last night. How is that even possible? But it made for a slowish start to the morning...

First things first. I headed to Las Palmas, one of my favorite restaurants, for pancakes. I had fun chatting with the waiter and got to see the owner, Rene, as well. He and I had a nice conversation over breakfast. From there, it was on to church.

Yesterday, I had searched online to look for an English church service here in Antigua. I had never really heard of one...and normally I'm eager to enjoy church in Spanish...but today I was hoping for church in my own language for some reason. I had found a comment online by someone that said the church at Hermano Pedro had an English service at 11:30, so I headed that way.

As I walked in at 11:25, there was no one there. I was a little surprised by how disappointed I was. But I decided to enjoy the beauty of the church; I hadn't been to this church in a long time. Hermano Pedro is a Guatemalan who was chosen for sainthood back in 2002. It was a really huge deal the first time I was in Guatemala years ago. There is a hospital right next to the church, and they have a lot of mission teams from the States work in their hospital. They have a beautiful mural on the wall of the church representing their medical work. I like where Jesus is holding the hands of the surgeons. May it always be HIM working through me...

As I was sitting there, an American couple walked in...and then another. And then a group of young Americans came in! We ended up with a group of almost 20 people, including kids! It was SO WONDERFUL to worship with other believers in Guatemala!! The majority of them are missionaries, but there were also a couple of students. Afterwards, I had a chance to meet everyone. One girl was even from McKinney, Texas. Small world! Several of them are with the Presbyterian church and have just come to do a year of service. They invited me to lunch and then to spend the afternoon with them. It was such a fun surprise! God gave me new friends, just like I asked Him! Look at these precious people God has chosen to use to bless the people of Guatemala!

Marcia and her son, Joshua

Katherine and Marcia's baby, Ava

Eva (from Denmark), Tina, Laura (from McKinney!)

Andrew and Kristen

Meandering at its best...

Wow! What a day! So full of wonderful activities and yet without agenda at all. Thank you for such a refreshing time!

This morning, I went to have breakfast with Fredy and his family. The last time I was in Guatemala, Fredy & Suzanne were just starting on their house. It was fun a to see a mostly finished house and get the grand tour. I LOVE THE TERRACE! Wish I'd taken pictures of the beauty to see up there!!!

It was wonderful to spend the morning with them - catching up on the happenings of the family. I love spending time with Fredy's mom, and Paola, Angel, and Chiquita have grown so much! And I got to meet the newest addition to the family! What a precious little angel!!!

Eylin, Fredy's sister, came by after breakfast and had to go to the market. I decided to tag along and spend some time with her. We bought potatoes and grapes, and visited Mayra in the market. Lazy but fun. By then, it was about 2pm - so I had Eylin drop me off at the hotel on her way home. After a catnap, I went to run a couple of errands and then went looking for some lunch/dinner. I decided on Casa Escobar - a fancy steakhouse I have seen often but never tried.
I sat at a table by the window and watched the people pass by.


My little plate of potatoes, steak, and garlic bread - along with my side of guacamole was the perfect little meal! After I finished, I spent a few hours reading and thinking and watching the people. So much relaxation. So wonderful. As it got dark, I headed back to the hotel for a quiet night. I went to bed early...thinking I could get up early Sunday and enjoy more of the daylight...